Also, time has been passing too quickly, and what with settling into my new home and a new place, I realize I've hardly had time for myself, let alone to write.
But of course, you and I both know that 'busy' is not an excuse :) You make time for the things you want to do.
What I want to write about today is really a certain phobia of things. I'm not going to tell you what it is, because I can't bring myself to type it, but because of this, it involves me scuttling in and out of my apartment as fast as I can go every day.
So, imagine me.
Dressed in my work clothes, made up. The minute I reach the ground floor, I run as fast as possible till I get out of my condo.
The same thing repeats itself at night, I hold my keycard ready, and when I step into my condo, I run in super fast, and sometimes I try and close my eyes so I don't see things, and only breathe a sigh of relief once I've jumped in the lift.
Not only that, I've been having dreams. Dreams about my phobia. Everywhere I go, it rears its ugly head and is ready to pounce on me!
Also, this sort of behaviour is a little surprising for your friends. My friend came home with me the other day, and got perplexed on why the minute I got in my apartment, I ran as fast as possible to the lift, leaving him behind. When I got to the lift, I realized he'd been left behind so there I was yelling for him to hurry up.
He calls me crazy.
So this has kind of been affecting my life! I started googling how to face your phobias, and one of the things to do is to take things step by step.
So here are a couple of things I'm doing.
I try not to run out of my condo. It's really hard. I succeed normally for the first ten seconds, then an overwhelming sense of panic comes over me and before you know it I'm running.
This morning, I listened to music and sang along to distract myself.
Yesterday, I thought about this bitch that I can't stand - but this was not very good, because both phobia or bitch are neither pleasant things to think about.
So, I'm going to continue this! I hope one day I'll be writing a blog post on how I've successfully overcome my phobia :)